when you first started dancing, was it hard, did you need a lot of upper body strength?
It was a little difficult at first. I noticed there was a sort of style to exotic dancing but with time and A LOT of practice, I began to get into the same rhythm as most of the other dancers. When it came to doing actual pole tricks, I had no problem climbing up the pole, but knowing what to do once I got up there was a challenge for the first few months. Lifting weights and doing core exercises helps tremendously strengthen your body so you can pull off more pole tricks. You definitely need a lot of upper body strength to pull off pole tricks, especially the more intermediate ones.
I came across a job posting last week and the position title was Social Companion. I was somewhat intrigued by this title so I decided to see what the position entailed. It turns out this was a more gentle term for non-sexual escorting. I wanted more information so I sent my picture in and a number. I got a call the next day. The lady on the phone explained to me that as a social companion, I would spend time with men on an hourly basis. There would be no type of sexual service or stripping involved. In fact, they discourage that kind of behavior in their business. Apparently I would just be providing company for these lonely men. I was all for this kind of work until I found out that most of the meetings with the clients are in hotel rooms. Mama didn’t raise no fool so my question is if sex isn’t offered, why are the meetings in hotel rooms? What are we going to do in a hotel room? Play some poker? Order room service and have pillow talk?
Truth be told, that varies on the club you’re working in. Before I started stripping, I had this idea in my head that all strippers were tall, exotic, well-endowed women. There are, however, dancers of many different shapes and sizes. More upscale clubs have higher standards with their dancers as far as being thin, big-breasted, pretty….basically a perfect 10. Other clubs, are more lenient with their girls. Some too lenient, to be honest.
“Applicants are told working as a stripper is flexible, lucrative, and that they will not be forced to do anything they do not want to do. Later, strippers discover that managers overbook them so they are forced to compete with each other, often gradually engaging in more explicit activities in order to earn tips. It’s important to understand that strippers are typically hired as ‘independent contractors’ rather than ‘employees.’ They have no fixed wage, and their income depends on pleasing customers in order to earn tips. They are not entitled to any of the following privileges: workers’ compensation, health insurance, unemployment benefits, or filing discrimination claims. Club owners save money by paying no Social Security, no health insurance, and no sick pay.”—Porn Myth 2. (via anon-cherrybomb)
I’m not sure if this topic is considered too taboo for tumblr but it’s my blog and this is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. In fact, I’m sure its a serious annoyance for most all exotic dancers. We’re supposed to be looking our sexiest when we’re at work. How is that possible when its that time of the month? When I’m on my period, I don’t look or feel sexy. Here’s the reasons why, and most should be pretty standard for most women:
There’s a war going on in my uterus
I’m seriously bloated and OH DOES IT SHOW!
I’m not in the best mood. In fact, if I were armed I’d probably go to jail for murdering a customer who tried to feel me up. That or I might cut a bitch for either stealing a customer or talking shit.
I want to eat EVERYTHING!
My back is killing me
I get bad break-outs on my face. Oh great!
On top of all this crap, I have to stress out about changing my tampon as much as possible. It’s always a fear of mine when that time rolls around that I’ll bleed on a customer. It’s happened before to other girls at they club. They’ve either been on stage and bled through an outfit or they’ve bled directly on a customer during a lap dance. It’s also super important to make sure you either cut the tampon string reaaaaaal short or you tuck that shit reaaaaaal good. I’ve seen it a couple times when a girl will be doing her set, she splits her legs open and you can see her string. Customers can see it too and it’s more embarrassing when they notice it first. Ladies, if you see a fellow dancer’s tampon string sticking out, PLEASE TELL HER!
I hate hate HATE working while i’m on my period. Technically I could just not work when I’m on my period but I don’t feel like losing money because of the female curse. I won’t be beat like that. I hope you ladies won’t either, but it’s your choice of course. My advice, take some Advil or Pamprin (which ever works best for you), change your tampon frequently, cut and tuck the string, and TRY not to kill anyone. Best of luck!
A lot of different clubs have these things called 2-4-1’s. I’m not sure if they work the same in all clubs, but I want to talk about mine. Depending on how busy the club is, my club has 2-4-1’s every 4-8 songs. The DJ will play this seriously lame music to let the patrons and dancers know its that time. BTW, by seriously lame music, I mean they play 2 Unlimited’s “Get ready for this.” If you were born yesterday or live under a rock, that’s the music in Space Jam and in Bring It On. That music will haunt you in your sleep. You’ll wake up thinking it’s time to start hustlin the hell out of some people! I’m my club, the 2-4-1 means that during that time, customers can get a 2-song table dance for $20 (the cost of what is normally for one song). Dancers also try and sell lap dances during this time as well. I feel kind of bad for new patrons because the DJ makes it sound like they get some sort of deal on lap dances…..but they don’t.
When dancers in my club hear that music, they start making their rounds and get to the real hustling. It sort of looks like an intense game of musical chairs. If for any reason you don’t get a customer to buy a dance from you during the 2-4-1, you have to get up on stage and dance for 2 songs. This sucks major for a number of reasons:
It’s kind of like the dance of shame when you have to get on stage during the 2-4-1. You either didn’t hustle hard enough, at all, or just plain didn’t appeal to the customer enough for him to buy a dance from you. It happens.
You might have just gotten off stage and now you have do another set.
There are only 2 small stages in my club and ANY girl who doesn’t sell a dance has to get on stage. Night shifts have anywhere between 14-35 girls. Can you picture 12 bitches on stage at one time?! It’s uncomfortable and forget about dancing at that point.
The 2-4-1 music sucks! They’ll only play that silly Space Jam song for a minute or so just to signal that its 2-4-1 time. They’ll generally play oldies or really classic rock for the actual set. This music IS NOT SEXY or fun to dance to for that matter (in my opinion).
If you do not sell a dance and don’t get on stage, they’ll fine you $5. Not a serious fine and if you’ve made enough money for the night, it’s a small price to pay to save yourself an unnecessary set. Some girls sit out because they feel they’re too good to dance on stage during 2-4-1’s. Some girls might just be tired, or lazy, or just taking some needed time during the 2-4-1 to get to know a patron. Really nice patrons who are interested in just talking to you will pay your $5 fine. They might even pay $20 for a table dance but not make you dance. $5 gets taken out of 2-song $20 dances anyways so you’re making money and you don’t have to dance. I hate to sound like a lazy stripper but I love not having to dance during a 2-4-1 but still getting paid just the same.
Even though the 2-4-1 deal is reserved for the table dances, you REALLY want to sell lap dances. If you start out trying to sell lap dances, but the customer doesn’t want one, the patron might still get a table dance. It’s that whole aim high, sell low strategy. 2-4-1’s can seriously suck sometimes if you’re not selling dances but they can also be the time to make serious bills. If the crowd is decent, you should always hustle hard during that time.
This varies from dancer to dancer. Some girls spend hundreds of dollars weekly to make sure they are in perfect shape for their weekly shifts. Some girls, let’s face it, don’t do enough to prepare themselves for their shifts. It all depends on what works for you, how much you’re willing to spend, and how much you can afford for that matter. Exotic dancers are generally expected to be looking extra good from head to toe. Yes, that means from weave to pedicured toes ladies!
I’ll give a quick run-through of my beauty routine. To make it simple, I’ll go from head to toe.
I addressed one aspect of this little issue in an earlier post. It was the Stripper Pet Peeve on people who think that exotic dancers aren’t intelligent. Unfortunately that isn’t the only negative way workers in the sex industry are viewed. Society paints a horrible picture of what we do and who we are. Many people think that we are any or even all of the following:
1. Drug-addicted. Coke tends to be the drug of popular belief when it comes to stereotyping strippers.
3. Lacking in self-respect/self-esteem
Though this may be the case for some people, it should not be generalized to ALL sex workers. It’s just like racial stereotypes. Not all black people are loud and like fried chicken. Not all Asian people are awesome at math. Not all white people can’t dance. Not all Hispanics and are uneducated. Getting the picture here? The same rule goes for strippers and any other type of sex worker.
I understand that society will never truly accept us. I’m not Obama here, so make no mistake, I’m not trying to advocate for some serious change. I’m simply expressing my concerns on how sex workers are portrayed and thought of by society. I just feel like its due to a lot of ignorance and conformity. People are going to judge what we do for a living, but we’re working hard and who’s to say we aren’t making an honest living? Sure, maybe some of us aren’t going about our money-making ways in an honest fashion, but again, that does not mean all of us aren’t. Food for thought.
SPP #38 - When patrons expect to have sex in the champagne room
In the words of Chris Rock,
"There’s no sex in the Champagne Room…None!
Oh there’s CHAMPAGNE in the Champagne Room
But you don’t want Champagne…you want sex
And there’s no sex…in the Champagne Room.”
Maybe in some clubs, you can get down and dirty with a stripper in the champagne room. That’s just not the case in my club (and I would think most to be honest). The rules don’t change just because you pay more for champagne and a little privacy. Please stop convincing yourselves that you can get away with more in that special room.
I let patrons know well in advance that the dances in the champagne room don’t differ that much from the VIP dances. The only difference is the champagne and the privacy. In my club, there isn’t even that much privacy in the champagne room. They are conveniently placed near the DJ booth so that DJ’s can see what’s going on. It can be odd for the dancer and the customers to know that there are a pair of eyes on them, but it comes in handy when you have drunk customers who get a little too rough. I’ve seen it happen a dozen times when a customer who’s had a beer too many can’t seem to keep his hands from exploring and then security guys take control of the situation.
Gentlemen, if you’re looking for a little extra, then look up your local escort agency rather than hoping you’ll get lucky in a strip club. It’s just not happening.
So I must confess that I have been on an on-and-off dancing hiatus this summer. It started because after I graduated, I moved back in with my parents. We live about an hour away from the club I work at. Not that bad of a commute right? It doesn’t matter because even if the club was 5 minutes away, it doesn’t change the fact that I live with over-protective, over-bearing parents who don’t want to acknowledge that I’m an adult. This is in part where being a secret stripper really blows. I’ve had to sacrifice working the club this summer all because I live with my parents. It’s generally not even on my mind up until I get a regular texting me to inquire when I’ll be in the club again. A good few loyal patrons of mine have been texting me regularly (sometimes once a week) asking if i’ll be back soon. It sucks to know that I could’ve been making money this summer and instead i’m stuck at home feeling like a child. My plan for the end of the summer (which has pretty much passed) was to get a job near the club, and that would serve as my cover job. I would live with an old neighbor while I worked the club and this cover job. This is what I did last summer when I first starting working the club.Highly complex I know. Two problems with my plan for this year:
1. I can’t get a job anywhere!
2. The neighbor I was going to stay with might be moving soon.
My life would be so much less complicated if I didn’t have parents that were all up in my business and had to know where I’m at and who with ALL THE TIME. I feel so suffocated sometimes and it’s just embarrassing in general. People ask me all the time why I still listen to my parents and why anything I do is there business. All I can say is your standard, “you don’t know my parents.” They’re not the kind of people you can just leave in the dark. Sure, I do that with my occupation, but that’s a serious task in itself.
I’m just incredibly frustrated and I just want to find a way to get back to the club as soon as possible. Worst case scenario (which isn’t really that bad), I wait until next fall when I get into grad school (which will be located near the club) and I work there then. I’ll lose a year worth of potential money and I might even lose some well-respected patrons :(. I guess only time will tell….
SPP #37 - When the DJ plays a bad song during my set
This doesn’t happen too often but when it does, it totally kills my stage buzz. Generally a bad song gets played because of any of the following reasons:
1. DJ doesn’t like you/you pissed him off so he’s taking it out on your stage set
2. DJ is trying out new music and it’s a flop (it happens)
3. DJ just doesn’t have a good feel for the music you dance best to
4. He’s a bad DJ (unfortunate, but not everyone is good at what they claim to be good at)
Now there are some bad songs that get played, but you can still dance to it like it’s nobody’s business. However, there are songs that are extremely hard to dance to. Songs that are either extremely slow, extremely fast, or have an off-beat rhythm are really hard to dance to. I mean so bad to the point that even the customers can tell that you’re struggling to make it through the song. Again, this rarely ever happens and I’m sure some of you dancers are just thinking “if you’re a good dancer, you should be able to dance to any song.” I would agree with you if it weren’t for the fact that I’ve seen the best dancers at my club get thrown a bad song and their set wasn’t that strong. It’s only ever happened to me a handful of times. In every case, I tried my best to follow the rhythm and dance as best I could.
Dancers generally dance their best when it’s to songs that they like the most. The DJ’s at my club know which songs I dance best to so they try to play those songs or ones like them the most. It’s like Pandora, but for strip club DJ-ing. If the song is bad, regardless of the complexity of its rhythm, it can bring your dancer energy down a notch. I don’t know if anyone can relate, but I’d much rather dance to a song where mentally and physically, i’m like “FUCK YEAH" and pulling out all my best pole and floor work than the song that makes me go "meh….whatever.”